Villains 101
by iheartkatamari
Summary: Oneshot. Hilarity ensues as the girls' foes make several attempts to capture them as the girls make their way to the mall. Based on a Captain Caveman episode.


**The storyline of this oneshot is based off of a Captain Caveman episode from the Flintstone Kids entitled, "Day of the Villains." Please enjoy!**

It's after midnight in the city of Townsville. In a large abandoned building in the middle of town, an enormous group of Townsville's villains are gathered before a large empty stage. After a matter of minutes, Mojo Jojo steps up to a podium on the middle of the stage; the evil monkey clears his throat. "I suppose you're all wondering why I've called you here tonight."

"You're gonna take us to the movies?" ask the Amoeba Boys.

"You're gonna give us money?" Princess Morbucks asks hopefully.

"You're gonna give us _ice cream_?" the Rowdyruff Boys ask even more hopefully.

"No, _no,_" Mojo replies. "It is something much bigger than that."

The Fluffy Bunch(1) exchange curious looks with each other. "Sumthin' bigger?" echoes Fluffy Kitty.

"Hm, wonder what that could be?" muses Cuddly Bunny.

"Ooh!" Puppy Wuppy suddenly pipes up. "Maybe he's gonna give us milk 'n cookies!" He and his associates happily lick their lips in anticipation.

"Ooh, or maybe he'sssss gonna give us all Slushiessss!" Snake notes.

"Yeah!" "That'd be great!" the rest of the Gang Green Gang reply.

"Or maybe he's gonna give us all fake mustaches!" Harold Smith says.

"Ooh yeah!" his daughter Julie replies excitedly.

"That would be wonderful!" his wife Marianne adds.

"Everyone loves fake mustaches!" his son Bud adds.

Mojo face palms exasperatedly. "If you all would stop interrupting, I could _TELL_ you what it is!"

"Sorry." "Pardon us." "You were saying?" the villains all reply.

"Now, as we all admit, we villains don't agree on many things."

"That's certainly right." "That's fer sure." "He's not wrong." the crowd mumbles among themselves.

"However," the evil monkey continues. "There _is _one thing that we can most certainly agree on," He then pulls a cord dangling from the ceiling, which reveals a large poster of the Powerpuff Girls with a red X over them. "We all _HATE _the Powerpuff Girls!"

"Yeahh!" "Yeah, yeah!" the crowd exclaims.

"I thus propose that all of us join forces to defeat the Powerpuff Girls once and for all, which is to say that we should band together and call a halt to their heroic ways for good, which is to say that we should form a group to stop these little pests once and for all. What say you?"

"Yeah!" "We like it, we like it!" "We are so there!" the crowd cheers.

"Then it's settled. Tomorrow we shall put Operation Stop the Powerpuff Girls into action!" Mojo punctuates his sentence with an evil laugh as the villains then disperse.

Bud turns to Julie. "Gee, that Mojo guy sure seems to repeat himself a lot, don't he?" His sister nods in agreement.

At the Utonium Chateau the next morning, Blossom is reading a novel, Bubbles is brushing a doll's hair, and Buttercup is dribbling a basketball. Suddenly, the hotline rings. "I'll get it!" Blossom hurries over to the phone. "Yes, Mayor? What might the matter be?"

"Why, nothing, Girls! For some strange reason there hasn't been any crime at all today; I've called to tell you that you can take the day off if you like."

"A day off?" Blossom echoes elatedly.

"Oh boy!" Bubbles exclaims.

"All right!" Buttercup cheers. The girls had been battling crime hard all week, and had been hoping for a break for quite some time.

"Thanks, Mayor. See you soon!" Blossom then hangs up.

"Hmm," Buttercup muses. "I wonder what might be fun to do now that we got some downtime?"

"I know! I know!" Bubbles replies excitedly. "We could go to the Townsville Mall 'n catch up on our shopping!"

"That's a great idea, Bubbles." Buttercup replies.

"Yeah," Blossom agrees. "Let's go, girls!"

After bidding the Professor a kind goodbye, the Powerpuffs fly quickly out the front door. Little did they realize, however, that their worst enemies were watching their every move. From behind a bush across the street, Mojo watches the girls leave, via a pair of binoculars; he takes a walkie-talkie out of his pocket. "The sparrows have left the nest."

"Huh?" replies a perplexed Princess, who's hovering above Townsville in a small airship.

"The sparrows have left the nest." the evil monkey repeats.

"But Mojo, we're not chasin' _sparrows_, we're chasin' those stupid Powerpuff Dorks!"

Mojo angrily face palms. "Oh, _that's what it means_! It's _code_, remember?!"

"Well, why didn't'cha say so?" the evil little girl replies schemingly. She had been hoping to get the jump on the girls all day.

"Proceed with Plan A."

"Mojo, Roger, ah, I mean, Roger, Mojo!"

At that moment, the girls fly past Princess' ship. "Oh gee," Princess says with mock sympathy. "I'll sure miss the Powerpuffs while they're away…but first, I'll _missile _them!" She laughs nastily as she presses a button on the ship's control panel, firing a missile at the girls.

As the missile whizzes by, Blossom and Bubbles quickly zip out of the way, and Buttercup catches the missile. "A missile!" Blossom exclaims anxiously.

"We gotta get rid of it, fast!" Bubbles adds.

"Sure thing!" Buttercup tosses the missile over her shoulder, sending it back toward Princess' ship.

"Ooh. This very bad now." says a highly concerned Princess.

**BWAMMMMMM! **The missile promptly blasts the ship. A charred Princess takes out her walkie-talike as she parachutes down. "Plan A has failed, Mojo."

"Very well, then," The evil monkey replies. "We'll have to proceed with Plan B then."

The girls stroll through the middle of town and stop on a street corner, next to a tall building. "Well, where would everyone like to go in the mall?" Blossom inquires.

"Toy store! Toy store! _TOY STORE_!" Bubbles hops up and down excitedly.

"And I wanna go to the sports supply store." Buttercup adds.

"Well, I think what would be best would be for each of us to go separately, that way we could all get to do what we want to do." Blossom notes.

"Good idea!" her sisters agree.

Unbeknownst to them, the Smiths are standing on the roof of the building above them, with a grand piano perched just before the edge. Harold takes a walkie-talkie out of his pocket. "The turtles are on the boardwalk."

"Excuse me?" Mojo replies from an alleyway in the midst of the city.

"The turtles are on the boardwalk."

The evil monkey's only reply is perplexed silence. "It's the girls." Harold replies.

"The girls are walking turtles down the boardwalk?"

"No, _no_, the girls are in position for us to enact Plan B!"

"Ah," Mojo finally comprehends. "Please proceed then."

"Sure thing, Mojo." The Smiths then proceed to shove the piano over. "Heh heh," Bud snickers nastily. "This'll knock 'em colder 'n a wet mackerel."

At that moment, the girls hear the sound of the piano falling; they then quickly look up. "A piano!" Bubbles exclaims.

"Don't worry, I've got just the thing." Buttercup quickly takes an enormous trampoline out of her pocket, which bounces the piano back up.

"Boy, Buttercup, bringing that trampoline along sure came in handy!" remarks an impressed Bubbles.

As the Smiths are gloating, a large shadow suddenly falls over them. "Uh-" Marianne begins.

"-Oh." Harold finishes.

**KRAAAANG! **The piano promptly clobbers them. The Smiths spit out piano keys, which play, "Shave and a haircut, two bits" as they hit the ground; Harold takes out his walkie-talkie again, "Plan B has failed, Mojo."

"Drats!" the evil monkey seethes. "Looks like it's time to up the ante. Proceed with Plans C, D, E, and F!"

"Roger, Mojo!" reply the Amoeba Boys from behind a mailbox on a street corner.

"Roger, Mojo!" replies Roach Coach from inside a trashcan inside an alley.

"Roger, Mojo!" replies Femme Fatale, who's driving a wrecking ball down the street.

"Roger Mojo? Oh, right, him!" replies Fuzzy Lumpkins, who's driving a steamroller alongside the wrecking ball.

As the girls walk along the sidewalk, they stop at a crosswalk and wait for the signal to change; once it changes, they stroll across. "_NOW!_" Roach Coach exclaims, as his roach army crawls out of the trash can at full speed. The Amoeba Boys then race toward the Powerpuffs, holding a net(Which was about the best they could figure to use), and Fuzzy and Femme begin motoring toward the girls.

"Heh heh," Fuzzy guffaws rudely. "Ah'm gonna run you down an' _leave you flat_!"

As they walk down the crosswalk, Bubbles suddenly bends over. "Ooh, look, a penny!"

Her sisters then follow suit. "Hmm, I wonder who it belongs to." Blossom muses.

"Maybe we could take it to the bank?" Buttercup replies.

No sooner do the girls bend over than the huge army of roaches crashes into them and goes flying everywhere; the roaches land on the Amoeba Boys, who begin running around in circles, yelling, "Help! Help! Get 'em off! Get 'em off!" while Roach Coach runs after them, trying to corral the bugs. They all run out into the street, too panicked to see Fuzzy and Femme coming toward them.

"Fuzzy, look out!" Femme exclaims. "Those are our guys!"

"Whooooooooooaaaaa!" Fuzzy quickly swerves to avoid hitting the Amoebas and goes skidding out of control, bumping into Femme's vehicle and causing her to skid out of control too; he ends up crashing into a building and she crashes into the back of his vehicle. The wrecking ball swings and wallops Fuzzy, sending him flying off into the distance. "Whoaaaooooahooooo!"

"Ohmigosh, what have I done?!" Femme gasps.

The girls walk off, unaware of the cacophony that's just occurred. Roach Coach, who, with the Amoeba Boys, is lying in a heap under the net in the middle of the road, picks up his walkie-talkie. "Plans C and D have failed, Mojo."

"So have Plans E and F." Femme adds, as a dazed Fuzzy crawls by in the background.

"Ughh, what _happened_?" he groans.

"Rats! Nothing's working!" Mojo snarls shaking his fist. "Looks like we're going to have to take drastic action now." He then begins heading in the direction of the mall.

The girls arrive inside the mall and disperse in the direction of their favorite stores, little knowing that their foes are still trailing after them. From outside the mall, Mojo calls on his walkie-talkie again. "All right everyone, proceed with Plans G, H, I, and J!"

"Roger, Mojo!" replies Fluffy Kitty who, with the rest of the Fluffy Bunch, is hiding between two stores in the hallway.

"Rro-ger, Mo-jo." replies Gul-Gor(2) who, with the rest of the Dooks of Doom, is hiding in the book store.

"Roger, Mojo." replies Ace who, with the rest of the Gang Green Gang, is hiding in the sports supply store.

"Roger Mojo?" replies a perplexed Boomer who, with the other Rowdyruff Boys, is hiding in the toy store. Brick promptly wallops him on the head. "Oh, heh heh, yeah, _him_! I forgot!" the blue Rowdyruff replies, rubbing his sore head. His brothers shoot disdainful looks at him.

"Excellent. We'll get those Powerpuffs for _sure _now!" Mojo punctuates his sentence with an evil laugh.

From their hiding place, Fluffy observes Buttercup walking toward them. She turns to her associates, "I'm wearing a fabulous new rhinestone collar."

Cuddly looks at her perplexedly. "What's that code for?"

"Oh, nothing, I just wanted you guys to see it." the little brown kitten hops out from her hiding place and strikes a diva pose as her collar sparkles in the light. "Ahh, isn't it lovely? I'd win _first prize _in any cat show for sure!"

Her associates exchange disdainful looks. "Seriously?" Cuddly whispers to Puppy, who nods in agreement.

"But, that's for another day," Fluffy continues. "The thing to focus on now is capturing Buttercup!"

"Right!" the three evil pets get ready to pounce as Buttercup closes in on them, when suddenly a worker from a nearby pet grooming salon(Which they'd very unwisely chose to hide near) picks them up.

"Well now, how did you little critters get out of your pens? Don't you worry none, I'll just take you back to th' salon, and we'll have you all fancied up in no time." The Fluffy Bunch meow, bark, and chatter in protest, but the groomer never seems to notice; Buttercup simply passes them by without a word.

Meanwhile, at the bookstore, Blossom is sitting at a table, browsing a book on physics; little does she realize, however, that the Dooks of Doom are lurking nearby. From their hiding place behind a nearby bookshelf, Whizzer motions toward Blossom. "Look! It's da pink Powerpuff!"

"Ooh, we get pink Powerpuff now, just like Mo-jo say!" replies Gul-Gor.

"Mo-jo be so proud of us!" Hog-Gwar adds.

Blossom is so absorbed in her book that she doesn't see Whizzer sneaking up on her from the other side of the table. No sooner does he reach the table however, than she slams the book shut on his face; the rat collapses to the floor in a daze. "Oooooog."

The pink Powerpuff wanders over to a bookshelf on the other side of the store. "Hmm," she muses. "I wonder if I've read any of these…" Little does he realize, however, that Hog-Gwar is hiding behind the shelf. As Blossom gathers an armful of books that she intends to buy, she accidentally jostles the shelf, sending a bunch of books cascading down on Hog-Gwar.

"Heeelp…" the pig groans weakly.

Blossom then walks over to a dictionary sitting on a table, contemplating possibly buying it, too, and begins to read it. At that very moment, Gul-Gor begins sneaking up on her, upon which the pink Powerpuff sits the dictionary back down on the table and leaves. As it happened, she had accidentally sat the dictionary on the table's very edge; as soon as Gul-Gor draws close, the heavy dictionary falls on his toe.

"Ooh! Ow! Yipe! Owie!" the large green gorilla squeals, as he hops around, clutching his sore toe. He's so distracted by this, he doesn't notice that he's about to bump into a bookshelf with another large heavy book balanced on top. _WHUMP_! The book promptly falls on his head. "Oooh, me go nappy-pie now…" mumbles a dazed Gul-Gor, who then collapses to the floor.

Meanwhile, at the toy store, Bubbles is looking over a large shelf full of dolls, little knowing that the Rowdyruff Boys are hiding nearby. "Heh heh," Brick snickers from their hiding place by the front door. "There's that twerp Bubbles!"

"We oughta get da jump on her _real easy_!" adds Boomer.

"Yeah," adds Butch. "She don't suspect a thing!"

Boomer quickly hurries over to the doll display, pulls the stuffing out of a teddy bear, then puts the bear's outside on, like a costume. After a little while, Bubbles walks up to him. "Ooh, isn't this just the cutest teddy ever? Let me give you a big ol' huggy-wuggy!" She then embraces Boomer-as-a-teddy bear in a vicelike hug.

"Air…Can't breathe…" he gasps.

"I'm definitely gonna buy this teddy. Hmm, wonder what else is here, I think I'll go take a look. Please come with me, Teddy!" the blue Powerpuff drags Boomer-as-a-teddy behind her, bumping his head along the floor as she goes(3).

"Ouch! Ooh! Yipe! Eep! Oh! Ow!"

Bubbles stops shortly to look at some miniature animals on a shelf in the middle of the store, unknowingly squeezing Boomer's head between two boxes behind her. "Ooogh.."

She then begins walking off again, bouncing Boomer's head off the floor again. "Oh! Ow! Eech! Oogh! Agh!"

The blue Powerpuff then suddenly becomes aware of the noise following her. "Hmm, I wonder what could be making that sound…" She looks behind her and suddenly gasps.

"Ohh, this must be one of those _talking teddies_! How sweet!"

She picks up Boomer-as-a-teddy and squeezes both of his hands, "Ooch!" "Owch!"

pokes him in the belly, "Oomph!" then gives him another suffocating hug. "Gguuuuhhhh…"

Suddenly, something catches her eye. "Ooh, what's that?" She then promptly tosses Boomer on the floor.

"The horror…the horror…" he groans.

Bubbles rushes over to a large bin full of small rubber bouncy balls. "Ooh, these are so much _fun_!" she exclaims excitedly. Little does she know, however, that Brick is hiding behind a nearby shelf, waiting to get the jump on her.

Bubbles picks out a bouncy ball and bounces it in her hand, then on the ground; she then picks out several more and begins to juggle them at high speed. "Whee!"

At that moment, Brick begins sneaking up on her, upon which Bubbles' hand slips and she sends the bouncy balls zinging away, pummeling Brick against the wall. "Oopsies!" says a concerned Bubbles. "Gee…I sure hope I didn't break anything…"

"Just me…" Brick groans.

The blue Powerpuff then traipses over to a wall lined with Super Squirter water guns. "Oh boy!" she exclaims excitedly. "These are soooo _COOL_!" She takes one off the wall and pumps its handle several times. At that moment, Butch begins sneaking up on her, upon which Bubbles fires a steady blast of water at him, pinning him to the wall. "Hmm," she muses. "Maybe Buttercup would like one of these."

"And I'd already had my bath this year…" Butch groans.

Meanwhile, at the sports center, Buttercup is jumping rope energetically, unaware of the fact that the Gang Green Gang are lurking close by. "Heh heh," Ace snickers nastily. "Buttercup don't suspect a thing, we'll get da jump on her fer _certain_!"

Big Billy is bouncing on a trampoline across the room. "Duh, yeah, an' dis oughta be da poifect thing fer us ta get da jump on her!"

"That's just a figure a'speech, you dope!" Ace snaps. "Y'know sorta like…'It's all water under da bridge.'"

"What bridge?" inquires Little Arturo.

"There ain't no bridge, that was just a figure a'speech too," Ace replies. "Like, 'Never da twain shall meet.'"

Billy stops bouncing and walks up to Ace. "Duh, what's a twain, boss?"

"Da twain on twack thwee!" Ace promptly wallops Billy on the head. "Com'on, you dopes, let's go get Buttercup!"

"Thbbt!" Grubber raspberries.

"Yeah, what he said!" Arturo agrees.

As she's jumping rope, the green Powerpuff notices a set of weights out of the corner of her eye. "Cool! I gotta try those!" She quickly rushes over to the barbells, picks the largest one up, and begins bench-pressing with it. At that moment, Grubber begins sneaking up on her; Buttercup accidentally bench-presses too hard and tosses the weight into the air.

A large shadow slowly engulfs Grubber. "Thbbtht." he raspberries.(Meaning, "Uh oh.") _WHAM! _He's then promptly flattened by the weight.

After which, Buttercup happens over to an indoor mini-golf set. "Hmm, this looks pretty clever," she muses. "Wonder how easy it is to play." She picks up a club, tees up a golf ball, and lines the club up, little realizing that Little Arturo is sneaking up on her.

As soon as he gets close, Buttercup swings her club, whacking him through the roof. "_YYYYEEEEEEOOOOOOOWWWWWW!_"

"Yikes," Buttercup gasps at the hole she's just made in the ceiling. "Guess I don't know my own strength; I'd better be more careful."

"You're telling me!" Arturo hollers.

Buttercup then traipses over to a table lined with footballs. "Ooh, sweet!" She picks one up and gets ready to throw it, not noticing Big Billy sneaking up on her at that very moment. Just as he gets close, Buttercup gives the ball a mighty fling, hitting Billy in his ample belly and pinning him to the wall. "It's a long bomb!" she exclaims.

"Field goal…" Billy groans.

Meanwhile, Snake unzips a nearby punching bag and climbs inside. "Heh heh heh," he snickers. "I'll jussst hide here like a ssssssnake in da grassss; she won't never even sssssee it comin'sssss."

At that very moment, Buttercup happens up to the punching bag. "Time now for for a workout!" She then begins punching the bag at high speed, not noticing the "Oh! Oww! Ooh! Yipe! Ooch! Eech!" coming from inside.

"Ahh, that was refreshing." the green Powerpuff sighs as she then traipses off; after she's left, the punching bag unzips and a very dazed and shaken-up Snake ambles out. "Ooooog." he groans, as he collapses to the floor.

Buttercup then traipses over to a hockey set. "Say, this looks like fun." She picks up a hockey stick and lines up a hockey puck, little realizing that Ace was sneaking up on her at that very moment. As soon as he draws near, the green Powerpuff begins slapping hockey pucks at high speed, pummeling him into the wall. "All right, it's a goal!" she cheers.

"Anyone…get da license number a'that snowmobile what hit me?" the Gang Green Gang leader groans.

While all of this is happening, Mojo Jojo paces impatiently outside the mall's entrance. "What's taking those goons so long? They surely should have captured those dratted girls by now!"

Shortly thereafter, a large group of very worn and worse for wear villains loins him. "We quit, Mojo." says a still charred and frazzled Princess.

"No matter what we try, they keep gettin' da better of us." says a still very bruised Ace.

"Thar too smart fer us bah far." adds a still shaken-up Fuzzy.

"We're humiliated." say the Fluffy Bunch, who have their fur all curled and puffed up, causing them to resemble giant dust bunnies.

"Bah!" the evil monkey scowls. "I should have known. Never send other villains to do an evil monkey's job. I shall defeat the Powerpuff Girls myself, which is to say that I will take matters into my own hands, which is to say that I will defeat them without the help of anyone else, which is to say…"

"WE GET IT ALREADY!" the other villains all bellow.

"Oh, pardon me." Mojo then takes a large ray gun out of his pocket and begins racing toward the revolving doors at the mall's entrance; no sooner does he step into the doors, however, than the Powerpuffs, who are holding several very full shopping bags, come out the doors, sending him spinning around rapidly, and flying off into the distance. "_WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHAAAAAAAAAAAA!_"

"Well, that was a good shopping day." says Blossom.

"It sure was," agrees Bubbles. "Wanna go home 'n try out our new stuff?"

"Sure!" replies Buttercup, upon which they then fly off toward home.

_So, once again the day is saved, unbeknownst…to the Powerpuff Girls!_

Voice Cast

Blossom-Cathy Cavadini

Bubbles/Bud Smith-Tara Strong

Buttercup-E.G. Daily

The Mayor/Snake/Groomer-Tom Kenny

Mojo Jojo/Butch-Roger L. Jackson

Fuzzy Lumpkins-Jim Cummings

Ace/Big Billy/Grubber/Harold Smith/Roach Coach-Jeff Bennett

Little Arturo-Jeff Garcia

Marianne Smith/Julie Smith-Kath Soucie

Brick/Boomer-Rob Paulsen

Amoeba Boys-Chuck McCann

Princess Morbucks-Jennifer Hale

Femme Fatale-Grey Delisle

Fluffy Kitty-Tabitha St. Germain

Cuddly Bunny-Kira Tozer

Puppy Wuppy-Jocelyn Loewen

Gul-Gor/Whizzer-Daran Norris

Hog-Gwar-Kevin Michal Richardson

(1) The Fluffy Bunch first appeared in the episode "Sweet and Sour."

(2) The Dooks of Doom first appeared in the episode "Girls Gone Mild."

(3) He got hit on the head? Pfew, for a second there, we thought he might've gotten hurt!


End file.
